Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Fairy Tale Theatre...

Tonight just before dinner, I had a few blessed moments for myself to work on the afghan I've been crocheting. Sensing the moment of weakness in the universe, my two youngest girlies appeared at my elbow:

Child Number Two: Hey, Mum!! We're hungry!! Can we have a couple of chocolate chip cookies for a snack?

Mother: No, Kiddo. Dinner's in fifteen minutes. Sorry it's a little late, we're waiting for your dear old Dad. How about a cracker or two, instead? They're in the red box on the second shelf in the pantry.

Child Number Three: (vehemently) NOPE!! Want COOKIES!! Crackers have no CHOCOLATE in dem!!

I knew something odd was in the works when my second child quickly whipped a hand over her younger sister's mouth, to avoid the tantrum-in-the-works from leaking out. She spun Wee Three around, and headed for the pantry.

Child Number Two: (loudly, and unconvincingly) OKAY, Mum!! Whatever you say!! We'll be having some DELICIOUS CRACKERS for a snack, while we wait for DINNER!! Right, sissy??!

And before Wee Three could protest any more, they nipped around the corner, out of my sight.

I could hear them rummaging around... and the opening of the cookie container, rather than the crackly white packaging that held the saltines.

Mother: (hot on their heels) BUSTED, Kiddo. Get your mitts off the cookies. I said CRACKERS.

Child Number Two: (dropping the cookies like hot stones, and springing for the crackers) Aaaaaaawwwwwwhhh!! I wasn't taking the cookies!! I wouldn't STEAL cookies!! I'm too SMART for that dumb trick!! (crunching thoughtfully, and scowling) If I REALLY wanted cookies, I could get 'em, though...

Mother: (interested) Oh, yeah? How?

Child Number Two: (cheerfully) Well, I'd take the crackers, 'cause that's what I'm S'POSED to do... But then I'd crumble them up, and leave a trail on the floor up to my bedroom.

Mother: (highly doubtful) I don't see how that kind of behavior would get you cookies...

Child Number Two: Yu-HUH!! You'd come looking for me when you saw the mess I made, and when you got to my room, I'd slam the door and lock you in, and THEN get the cookies!!

Mother: (too flabbergasted to speak)

Child Number Two: (swaggering a little) Pretty good, huh?

Pretty GOOD??!

Damn Hansel and Gretel...


shawn said...

Hansel & Gretel huh??

If the girlies are Hansel and Gretel wouldn't that make you the ....????

Hey ... your kids are pretty sharp on MANY levels !!!

ewe are here said...

Sounds like she's thought this through... ;-)

Multi-tasking Mommy said...

That child #2 is a sneaky one, isn't she?

SciFi Dad said...

That? Was awesome.

You should be so proud.

Candygirlflies said...

Shawn: Hey, witches can be awesome. My "Elphaba" is sublime, I assure you.

This is the problem with having kids who think things through... they become increasingly more dangerous (and effective) with age...

xo CGF

painted maypole said...

ha ha ha ha ha

Leeann said...

Craaaap. THIS is what I have to look forward to with the 2 year old, huh? wonderful.

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