Monday, July 2, 2007

Work it, baby-girl...

This evening, I was in a bit of a conundrum about dinner... The shops were all closed for the official Canada Day holiday, and I suddenly discovered at about five o'clock that I was SERIOUSLY low on groceries. The rest of the family members were oblivious to this crisis, as the majority of them were busy working up intense appetites in the swimming pool, where they had spent most of the afternoon.

The Goddess was in deep doo-doo, people.

Because, there ain't NOTHING in this world that can kill the atmosphere of a fun-filled holiday weekend like three exhausted, starving kids... THAT spells Meltdown City, and THAT was a place that The Goddess simply didn't. want. to. go.

So, I did what I usually do in most crises. I plugged my ipod into the big speakers we have in the kitchen, and cranked up the file marked "PANIC MODE".

Rocking out to loud, raucous music has a miraculous effect on me, as a rule. It seems that the harder it is for me to hear the negative, stressed-out voices in my head, the more effective I become at problem-solving. There are many selections on my Panic Mode list. I find most tunes by OK-GO extremely effective, and also artists like Pink and Aerosmith. Basically, in general, I find the Higher the Attitude, the Heavier the Beat, the better.

It was while I was shaking my booty, and simultaneously sticking my head deep into the depths of my refrigerator to see what "still-edibles" lurked within, that my little three-year-old daughter wandered in the back door. She was dripping wet, but when she heard the irresistable strains of Nelly Furtado's "Maneater" and saw ME dancing, she promptly dropped her towel and joined in the fun.

Now, we play a lot of grown-up music in this house, as a rule. It is my firm feeling that Children Cannot Live By Raffi Alone, and parents definitely SHOULD not, for the simple reason of maintaining their sanity. My kids are intimately familiar with MOST of my favourite songs at any given time, but there is no doubt that there is SOME music out there in the popular culture that is not entirely suitable for young ears.

But, all that aside, I cannot even BEGIN to describe how hilarious it was to watch a soggy three-year-old perform a flawless shimmy-shimmy to old Nelly's kind-of-inappropriate tune. I think it was the droopy diapers that REALLY "sealed it" for me... Nonetheless, the beat was THERE, people, and baby-girl had it goin' on! The song was HOT, even to a pre-schooler, and she just couldn't help herself any more than I could.

We grooved till the song was over, attempting to outdo each other with more and more ridiculous moves, and didn't have the foggiest notion that we were being watched by my incredulous husband, who had entered the back door just after Wee Three. Now, my husband is a child of the sixties, and is of the very firm opinion that there are NOT many popular bands worth listening to beyond about 1975. And NO DISCO. That in itself makes him redeemable in my eyes. Other than that, though, let's just say our tastes DIVERGE.

Once the ringing in our heads stopped (YES, we had it turned up THAT LOUDLY), he was able to find his voice and queried:

Father: What. The. HELL. Was. That????!!!

Child Number Three: (with the innocence of an ANGEL) C'mon, Daddy!! It SHARON, LOIS, AN' BRAM!!!

ps. We ordered a pizza while Daddy was still unconscious.

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