We are experiencing technical difficulties...

I want to swear.

Badly.

I want to let forth a stream of true-blue blasphemy so creative and intricately detailed that it would make Satan himself cover his pointy little ears and run screaming from the vicinity.

For the past two days, my internet connection has been fading in and out, without any apparent cause or warning. Countless emails have been bouncing. My husband and I have been rendered incapable of working from home with any degree of efficiency. Entire blog posts-- which were moving and inspired and nothing short of BRILLIANT, I assure you (and yet, have no proof of that fact)-- were sent spinning out into the ether, lost forever.

I have spent countless hours on the telephone, consulting with various technicians and trouble-shooters, and have been completely unable to convince them that the problem could possibly lie with anything other than ME: MY equipment (which is fairly new, really), MY set-up, MY passwords...

Yesterday, after eight hours of hanging around the house and WAITING, a representative from Bell finally deigned to darken my doorstep. After spending about ten minutes examining the telephone lines and the internet hook-up, he shrugged his shoulders, began scribbling a note on his clip-board, and announced that his "buddy" would be around to check out the issue "tomorrow".

And then he left.

This morning, with what little signal I can coax out of my modem, I desperately dialled up this video clip from good ol' Ronnie James. And, as he always does whenever he rolls into town and gets up a show at our local theatre, he made me laugh. He made me feel better. He made me feel "normal" again.

Thanks, Ron... you've spared my readers from seeing the "darker side" of my usually fairly cheerful and optomistic personality...

I'm saving THAT for the poor sod of a technician who is due to arrive at any moment.

Because unfortunately for HIM, I don't speek "Geek".

I am, however, completely fluent in Stevedore....